Saturday, January 3, 2009

Christmas with the In-Laws

We knew that Christmas with my husband's family would be tough this year.

Todd's dad was diagnosed with Alzheimer's a few years back and was placed in a special unit of a nursing home this past summer. It is particularly sad because he is young--still in his 60s.

We stayed at the house with his mother. She especially enjoys having our kids around. Todd's sister, Brenda, and her family came over for a Mexican dinner and then we opened presents. This tradition has been enjoyed by all of us for many years; however, last year was our first year without Todd's oldest nephew, Tyler, who was killed in a car accident in September of 2007. Tyler was a one-of-a-kind who loved his family. He typically made sure that Grandma got a new frog to add to her bathroom collection. Of course, we were also missing Heath and Stef since they are in San Diego where Heath is stationed in the US Navy. In the past, Grandma's superstitions would bother her when we set the table for the 13 of us. This year, we were down to 10.

The next day my parents came over to join us for our big Christmas dinner--complete with turkey, ham, homemade noodles, mashed potatoes, lots of pie, etc. Although I slept in, I was up and around in time to help set the table. While carrying the hot rolls over to add to the feast, a sudden tickle forced me to turn my head and sneeze! They safely made it to the table before we all sat down to eat.

Halfway through the meal, my sister-in-law pointed out that I had dropped a noodle on my sweater sleeve. My thoughtful nephew, Joel, kindly picked it off before I even had a chance to set my silverware down. The words that followed about made me choke, he said, "This isn't a noodle." The whole family gawked as I began laughing so hard I couldn't talk. Finally I was able to sputter, "Joel, you might want to go wash your hands." As the whole story about carrying the rolls to the table unfolded, tears were running down my face from laughing. By now, the whole table was laughing as we pictured Joel gagging in the bathroom as he scrubbed his hands.

Later that afternoon we visited Grandpa Larry. He opened his gifts and was most excited about the free calendar that Todd got from a local John Deere dealer with pictures of antique tractors. He went through each month, pointing at them and exclaiming over the "cars." This visit was the hardest yet because he didn't seem to recognize us at all. At this point, he is unable to process information--this includes conversation, TV...anything. He just doesn't understand any type of communication. He just nods his head and says, "Yes honey" to everything.

Although Todd couldn't hardly even stand to watch his dad, the kids responded to him beautifully--even giving him big hugs when it was time to go. Brenda didn't seem to want to release him from her hug. Over the last year and a half I know she has really needed her daddy. It was like she was trying to hug him back into his body. Even as we left, she continued to turn and wave to him with the tears streaking down her face.

Oh, to be able to set that table for 13 again...

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